It’s a dream, I know it is a dream.
It has to be a dream.
In my dream, I have super powers. I am strong, I am unbeatable, I am fierce.
In my dream I am safe and no one can hurt me.
No, it is not a dream.
I am weak, I have no fight, I am feeble, over powered.
I know this is not a dream because I can feel the pain, deep
within, mentally, physically, I can feel the pain.
“What is this? I refuse to drink it, I won’t drink it. This is too strong and what is that white
stuff floating on top?”
“Stop acting like a baby, drink it, and take off your
clothes!”
“Let me be, I don’t want it.”
I do nothing, refusing to give in. I have to believe that he won’t hurt me
again. I want to believe, but know I
really don’t. After all, the last time
he hurt me so bad, threatened me and scared me to death. I knew if I didn’t do as he said, he would
hurt me when he came for me. This time I
would go with him, without a fight. I
could not afford for him to show up unexpected.
If I refused, he would hurt me worse.
Just like before. In my heart I
had to believe doing as he said would save me the pain later.
“Michelle, I am tired of asking you. Don’t make me force you. I don’t want to hurt you, I just want to feel
myself in you, for you to submit like a girlfriend should.”
“I am not your girlfriend!
I don’t want to do this, how many times do I have to tell you this? You keep promising me you will leave me alone
but each time you hurt me worse than before and you still threaten me and force
me to do this. I don’t want to do this!”
“Fine, I guess I will send the video to your husband in the
mail. Once I put it in the mail, I
cannot take it back. Your husband will
see it and will think that you are having an affair with me. No one will know how drunk and drugged you
were, they will just see you submitting to me and letting me take you. You can’t even tell that I raped and drugged
you.”
“Please don’t, please don’t hurt me anymore. I will listen, I won’t fight back, I will do
ask you ask, just don’t hurt me anymore.”
No matter how much I plea, it means nothing. He has the intention to do as he
pleases. The more fight, the worse the
choke, the worse the hit, the more I have to beg and squirm to keep my hands
from being tied behind me. The first
taste of the drink, instantly making me gag. It burns as it goes down my
throat. The white stuff has not mixed
well. I can taste the powdery taste, I just know it is some type of pill. No different from the last time. But, like before, I still did not know what
it was. I was hoping this time he would
tell me the truth. At least I would
know.
I fight because I cannot take another sip.
“Michelle, you are wasting my time. The faster you submit and let me have you,
the faster you will be able to go home.”.
As he begins coming back towards me I see that hard blue
plastic wrap again. I move away and he
begins to fight me, trying to tie my hands.”
“Okay, I will listen, please don’t tie me up again!”
“Drink it, drink it faster Michelle. Take your damn clothes off or I will do it
for you.”
I slowly begin removing my clothes. I could feel my body trembling all over. I hate what is about to happen again. I hate I am too weak.
“Drink some of this.” He brings the straw to my face. I push it away, but not before he grabs my
wrist, squeezing it tight.
“I can’t, it is too strong, what is this stuff.”
“Something that will make you submit, calm you down so you
can enjoy me deep inside you.”
“Leave me alone, I can’t.
You promised me you would not make me drink anything anymore. .
“Scared, I
beg to go to the bathroom. I stay in for
what seems like only less than a minute. I suddenly hear him call to me,
telling me he has given me enough time, come out and submit to him.
I wait a little longer and tell him I am not done and don’t
feel well, but that only makes him angrier.
I can tell by his voice that he is not willing to wait anymore. Reluctantly I come from the bathroom, still
naked, holding my arms tightly around my body.
“Hurry up and get over here.”
I hurry to the bed, quickly trying to get the covers wrapped
around me, but just as I pull them up to cover my body, he pulls them off of
me, pulls me to the floor, and puts his hand around my neck. In fear, I quickly pull both of my hands to
his one to keep him from choking me, but his grip just becomes tighter.
“Michelle, let go and drink this, don’t make me hurt you.”
I am tired of fighting, so I take a sip, I don’t want to
chance what might happen if I keep resisting.
Slowly I could feel my body weaken.
I could tell my thoughts were becoming hazy. My sight was blurry and I was becoming very
limp.
“Drink some more, faster!”
I am not sure how much time had passed, but at points I
could feel myself coming in and out of it.
I kept telling myself to fight it, fight a little harder. I could remember small periods of him inside
me, whispering in my ear. Not sure what
he was whispering sometimes, while other times I could hear him tell me, “you
feel so good Michelle. That is right,
you are my girlfriend, my whore, my sex slave. I am going to have you whenever
I want. You are going to learn to submit
to me and worship my cock.”
The one vivid memory I could remember (now) was waking up
with him on top of me. He was biting at
my neck bone saying how beautiful it was.
He noticed that I had come to a bit and he said, “you were so good, you
are going to be a good girlfriend.”
At that point he told me to get up and “suck my cock,
worship my cock.” I started to cry and
begged him to leave me alone. At that
point he got angry and asked why wasn’t I being a good sex slave, he treated me
good, I was a good girlfriend, we would make a great couple. I remember turning my head towards the door
and that is when I saw it. The camcorder
on a stand, pointing straight my way.
When I went to push him away, he grabbed me by my arms to the
floor. I just remember fighting him,
asking him why he was doing this. I
asked him why when he promised me he wouldn’t tape me or take pictures
again.
All the while, pushing my face towards his penis, telling me
that he needed something to watch in between him seeing me and to make sure I
remembered he could always send the video to my husband if I tried not to see
him and not be an obedient girlfriend.
I remember thinking to myself (I still do) how he could say
in the same sentence that I was his girlfriend and his sex slave. How in the world did those two make sense in
the same sentence?
I was trying to push him away, I was determined that I was
going to get out. At this point, what
did I have to lose? Absolutely
nothing. Who cared that I was
naked? I was already on tape, this time
and before. He already had pictures of
me.
The fact was, I had not escaped!
