The Devil's Paradise

When the darkness comes, the darkness from within looks for its escape,

Looking for its chance to send frightening chills throughout the body.

All bets are off once the eyelids shut as the devils paradise opens for the daily carnival.

The Ferris wheel represents the thrusts of his body moving in and out of me continuously, only stopping to change positions, the same as unloading new riders.

The popcorn machine represents the sweat dripping on my body and the butter, the sweat that accumulates in my groin area after hours of intrusion.

The roller coaster, representation of the forced oral that I cannot resist unless I welcome strikes to the face or stomach, maybe a strong choke hold.

The swings are my flashbacks, from past incidents that also choose to take hold of my mind, even during another encounter against my will.

The merry-go-round doesn't stop in my mind because the alcohol with mixture of a strange substance makes my head feel like I am turning in circles...

The only difference is in the devil's paradise, the merry-go-round goes faster and faster, to the point that the faster it goes, the horses start flying off...

Those horses are parts of my mind, parts of my being, withered away...piece by piece, each interaction, the merry-go-round goes faster.

The devil's paradise tries hard to take over the carnival.  It loves to be in action, even when the eyelids struggle to stay open.

The devil is looking for anyway to get in, in order to invade my body and soul.

Everyday I struggle with the battle within.  

There are times when the battle seems a loss, one I am at a loss with no signs of a chance to survive.

When I close my eyes, I fear the devil hanging out and playing in its designed carnival, without any regard as to whether I want to play or not.

Instead of a carnival, I need to change the darkness of the devil to the light of my higher being.  

The light within my eyelids that drown in the sounds of nature, fresh air, fresh smell of nature, clear sounds of nature, seagulls talking to each other, the sound of the ocean waves, the sounds of peace, calmness, me relaxing, not making me tight and ready to explode.

The devils paradise is NOT my paradise.

I will NOT let the devil's paradise take over MY paradise.

I will find my paradise, in time I will...

My paradise will help me become a better person.

My paradise will one day be my paradise, only my paradise. 

One with no room for the devil having the ability to enter and consume any piece of my energy.

My paradise will be beautiful.

My paradise will be strong.

My paradise will be filled with plenty of courageous energy.

My paradise will be one with self-loving, self-worthiness, and self-respect energy.

My paradise is no longer going to be the devil's paradise.

I stake my claim in my paradise with no room to entertain the devil.

THIS IS MY PARADISE!