Tuesday, April 14, 2015

April 14, 2015 - 9:30 AM

So, I am at work – work up on time and even though my oldest daughter was not cooperating, I got out of the house on time.  Driving to work was very hard.  Lots of things on my mind.  I had a horrible evening.   The evening started out bad before it even came. 

All late afternoon I felt like I had bugs crawling all over me.  I felt dirty.  I felt so dirty that I found a magnifying glass to confirm for myself that there was nothing crawling on me that was unseen by the eye.  Of course there was nothing there.  I already knew that, but the feeling was so intense.  I felt like I wanted to crawl out of my skin.

Anyway, I am not really sure how the night ended.  I did start to do homework.  I was doing very well for quite a while until more thoughts started coming at me.  After I had this one memory of this last incident, I was all of a sudden flooded with other incidents that happened.  They kept coming at me.  I probably could have dealt with it until the physical pain came.  It hurt so badly.  It felt as if my insides of my private area were ripping out of me.  I held onto the pain and started the breathing exercises.  I kept getting up, having cigarettes, and even tried writing and going back to my school work.  Nothing was happening.  So I gave in and had a drink.  Since that didn’t work, all I can assume is I went to sleep.  I hope I did.  I don’t want to cause anymore anguish to my family. 

I want the support of my family, but I have decided I will keep that as far away from having to deal with it as possible.  I think I should be able to know that they support me and want to help, but they don’t and should not have to deal with all of this.  It isn’t fair.  I am going to keep using my tools, work on putting on a happy face and deal with this as much on my own as possible.  If I can do everything I can do to work through this without involving them, it will be best.   I know that is what I tried to do with this last incident, but it didn’t work out that way. 

I tried everything in my power to just deal with it.  I know that is what he kept telling me to do, but when he was so rough and hurt me so bad, I could not hold it together later after the incident.  I tried to just comply.  I tried to pretend that it was an affair, but how could I when someone threatens you, hits you, chokes you, and then reminds you that you deserved it and that I had no choice unless I wanted to ruin everything positive in my life.  How could I be okay with myself and keep pretending everything was fine?  The more I was compliant, the more he did, the worse it became.  I even asked him why he was doing that.  I needed to understand if he wanted me to simply pretend as if I was his girlfriend and let him do what he wanted to do when he wanted to, why he would hurt me so that I would have a reaction, so that I would have to fight back.  I just wanted to understand why it was all happening to me.

I know I am not crazy, but I feel like I am sometimes.  Especially when the memories become so intrusive.  I want to feel normal again.  I want to know and really believe that I will get better.  I want my body to feel the way it used to.


I am so close to graduation and I am so excited.  Once I arrived at work I told myself to change my thinking.  Focus on the positive things in my life at this time.  Focus on the positive things that were coming up.  I am going to keep writing, especially when the thoughts are bad.  I know it might not work 100%, but it will work enough to keep me going, even if it is for a moment.  I can do this today.  I can have a good day today.  I am going to take it one step at a time because I have no choice to do anything differently if I want to truly keep going, which I do.

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