Saturday, July 25, 2015

I AM OKAY, RIGHT NOW, TODAY, RIGHT NOW - THANK YOU!

It is a very exciting feeling when you begin to understand yourself more and are okay with the person you look at in the mirror.   It is not every day I have this feeling.  Sometimes it is for a moment and other times it is not at all.  But when I do get that feeling I try hard to hold onto it, appreciate it and embrace it.

When I was younger I remember wondering why I hated the person I was.  I did not understand why I did not feel like I had many true meaningful relationships.  My mother and aunt would tell me that it was not the number of people you considered friends but how meaningful they were and that usually meant that you could count on one hand who your friends were.

Interesting enough though, my mother and aunt made a decision to become Girl Scout leaders so that I could build the relationships with others who were like minded and that had the same values and morals that I was raised with.  They definitely were leaders for other reasons, but I do know the initial thought was they wanted me to be in a group where I did not feel isolated and unwanted.  These ladies along with another leader they worked with over the years (and many others) were exceptional leaders in the community.  They focused on us girls to help build our confidence, our self-esteem, and anything and everything that would help us grow up to be productive young ladies and not just take from society, but to be valuable assets in the community and contribute to make it a better place, including those that would come in contact with us throughout our lives.

Even with all of the positive people in my life and the repeated reminders that I was a good person, I was smart, beautiful and likable, I never really felt it in my heart.  I only would focus on the negative feedback I would receive from others.  I remember being teased, bullied, and broken down from all of the hate I received from a lot of people I grew up with.  For some reason, I did not learn the skill of letting it go.  I did not learn how to love myself and not allow others to define who I was. 

There was nothing good enough that would keep me from feeling my lowest.  There was nothing that anyone else could do or say that would help me release all of the negativity I was feeling and just let it go.  I took all that anger I felt and I aimed it directly at myself.  All inward, never in a healthy way, aiming it at those that really deserved it. 

As crazy as it seems to me now as an adult, I don’t think even when I felt happy I was truly happy.  I covered up my pain.  I was the master of facades.  I was the master of manipulation.  I was the master of making (or thinking I was) people think I was okay.  I was not me.  I was playing a part in a world that I wanted to be but wasn’t.

I go back to the Girl Scout experience.  I go back to it because my life was engulfed in it.  I was not just a Girl Scout, but I was everything and anything I wanted it to be.  It allowed me to be something I was not sure I was.  It allowed me to play a role that I was perfect at.  I was powerful, I was strong.  I was in a world that I could make all mine.  I could escape with the community involvement.  I could make people like me, adore me, look up to me because I represented someone that was doing something positive and to the world I was good. 

So today, I am trying to figure out who I am, what I am, what I like to do and more importantly, why I like to do what I do.

I want to feel the goodness in everyone.  I want to feel the high I experienced when I was doing things that made people feel good, made me feel good.  I want to feel that natural high of living me for me because I am doing something positive.  I am not really sure what I am trying to say other than I am at a place that I want to love the person I am.  I want to love the person that my mother and aunt wanted to nourish to become a power house.  I want to be that person that loves who they look and love in the mirror and says to those that throw any negative stones, FUCK YOU!  I am good.  Why?  Because your hate makes me stronger. 

I am at a place where I want to feel good.  I want to be at a place where I want to love myself for me, not because I am waiting for some acceptance from someone, others that don’t deserve it.  I love me.  I like me.  I like my tenacity. 

I worry sometimes what my writings will do to those I love and love me.  But I have to believe that they would rather me express myself and release my pain and suffering this way than come together with others to bury me.


I am at a good place today.  I am at a good place at this moment.  I want to stay in that place and this is definitely doing it.  At this moment, at this very moment, I Love myself, I wrap my arms around that child that was lost and still is lost and I remind her that she is strong, she is beautiful, she is smart, she is a productive member of society that is possibly helping someone else in their dark time of need to make it another day.  Because I am!  Damn, I am good today.  Thank GOD for that!

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